nativity

Again this idea of home, your roots, your identity is part of this work. I did not know what I was drawing/painting. Only when I stopped did i see the stick figures. One seemingly feminine holding a new born, the other arms out and active seemed masculine. So I was drawn to think of the christian nativity but also the nativity of myself, so that’s how I get back to roots again. I painted it in tandem with god’s window so maybe I was working through religious under themes. There is also the idea of the inner child and my masculine and feminine selves. That is quite a confusing thing for me, brought up in a scholastically ambitious family, my sister and I chose masculine dominated professions, not that we were really aware of that. We just did, performed, excelled and failed to varying degrees of success. I am aware from this standpoint that I was socially quite confusing, as I was not standard issue in my societies terms anyway. I was breaking boundaries going places that other people were not quite comfortable with. But I always conformed to my rules, like painting when I should be doing homework, I did enough to go where i wanted to go, but not knowing why I wanted to go there. Unaware of the boundaries I broke til I broke them…. it is a good way to see the underpinnings of society, by unknowingly following your own trail, and seeing how the world around me reflects that. It can be quite confronting coming face to face with other people’s image of their inner man or woman, especially when yours does not conform. So this gender antagonism, and I know it is there, inside me as well as out there… it is a journey of making sense of me and my relation with out there. It is not an easy solution, it is a complicated tail and millions of interlapping tales.tolerance and creativity and the guts to go into and find your own conceptions of what is male what is female and how they combine in the special way that is you.Nativity 2003

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